2002 FZ:OZ (live)

2002 FZ:OZ (live)
"Hordern Intro (Incan Art Vamp)"
[Deranged Fan:] RIGHT NOW!
[FZ:] Good evening, ladies & gentlemen, welcome to The Mothers Of Invention Extravaganza for Sydney, Australia, 1976. And tonight featuring the dynamic Napoleon Murphy Brock on tenor sax and lead vocals...
[Napoleon:] Wen-a-hena-hena-hean (Hel-l-l-lp me!)
[FZ:] The probably overheated later in the program Andre Lewis on keyboards, the extremely susceptible to increases in tempo tiny skinny foxy little cute little available tonight to each and everyone of the ladies in the audience, and maybe some of the other persons that might be interested in him, little skinny Terry "Ted" Bozzio on drums. And last, but not least, Roy Ralph Moleman Guacamole Guadalupe Hidalgo Estrada on bass.
"Stink-Foot"
[includes a quote from Dragnet (Schumann/Rosza)]
In the dark
Where all the fevers grow
Under the water
Where the shark bubbles blow
In the mornin'
By yer radio
Do the walls close in t' suffocate ya
You ain't got no friends . . .
An' all the others: they hate ya
Does the life you been livin' gotta go, hmmm?
Well, lemme straighten you out
About a place I know . . .
(Get yer shoes 'n socks on people,
It's right aroun' the corner!)
Out through the night
An' the whispering breezes
To the place where they keep
The Imaginary Diseases,
Out through the night
An' the whispering breezes
To the place where they keep
The Imaginary Diseases, mmm . . .
This has to be the disease for you
Now scientists call this disease
Bromidrosis
But us regular folks
Who might wear tennis shoes
Or an occasional python boot
Know this exquisite little inconvenience
By the name of:
STINK FOOT
Y'know, my python boot is too tight
I couldn't get it off last night
A week went by, an' now it's July
I finally got it off
An' my girl-friend cry
"You got STINK FOOT!
STINK FOOT, darlin'
Your STINK FOOT puts a hurt on my nose!
STINK FOOT! STINK FOOT! I ain't lyin',
Can you rinse it off, d'you suppose?"
Here Fido . . . Fido . . .
C'mere little puppy . . . bring the slippers
"Arf, arf, arf!" (crash-crumble-bump-bump-bump)
Heh heh heh . . . sick . . .
Well then Fido got up off the floor an' he rolled over
An' he looked me straight in the eye
An' you know what he said?
Once upon a time
Somebody say to me
(This is a dog talkin' now)
What is your Conceptual Continuity?
Well, I told him right then
(Fido said)
It should be easy to see
The crux of the biscuit
Is the Apostrophe(')
Well, you know
The man who was talkin' to the dog
Looked at the dog an' he said: (sort of staring in disbelief)
"You can't say that!"
He said:
"IT DOESN'T, 'n YOU CAN'T!
I WON'T, 'n IT DON'T!
IT HASN'T, IT ISN'T, IT EVEN AIN'T
'N IT SHOULDN'T . . .
IT COULDN'T!"
He told me NO NO NO!
I told him YES YES YES!
I said: "I do it all the time . . .
Ain't this boogie a mess!"
THE POODLE BY-EE-ITES
THE POODLE CHEWS IT
THE POODLE BY-EE-ITES
THE POODLE CHEWS IT
THE POODLE BY-EE-ITES
THE POODLE CHEWS IT
THE POODLE BY-EE-ITES
THE POODLE CHEWS IT
(POO-DLE . . . )
THE POODLE BY-EE-ITES
( . . . BITES)
THE POODLE CHEWS IT
(POO-DLE . . . )
THE POODLE BY-EE-ITES
( . . . BITES)
THE POODLE CHEWS IT
(POO-DLE . . . )
THE POODLE BY-EE-ITES
( . . . BITES)
THE POODLE CHEWS IT
(POO-DLE . . . )
THE POODLE BY-EE-ITES
( . . . BITES)
THE POODLE CHEWS IT
THE POODLE BY-EE-ITES
THE POODLE CHEWS IT
THE POODLE BY-EE-ITES
THE POODLE CHEWS IT
THE POODLE BY-EE-ITES
"The Poodle Lecture"
In the beginning GOD made 'the light.' Shortly thereafter GOD made the poodle-as you can see by this model that we have in front of us. When GOD made the poodle initially it was a very handsome sort of a dog-it had HAIR, HAIR, HAIR, evenly distributed all over its charming canine poodle-shape body.
Shortly after the construction of the poodle itself, GOD made TWO big mistakes. The first one was called MAN, and the second one was called WO-MAN. WO-MAN looketh upon the poodle and saith unto herself, "This poodle, with hair evenly distributed all over its body, is of no use to me for it is not SLICK, it is not STREAMLINE, it is not FASHIONABLE, and in many instances it is REPULSIVE because of the brown things attached to the hair on the rear part of the dog, and I must have this dog modified," so he turneth onto MAN, and saith unto MAN, "SUCKER, GO GET A JOB!" And MAN, being the chump that he was, wenteth out and wenteth forth and lefteth the cave, and went into the world itself and gotteth a job.
Whereupon he returneth to the cave with his MONEY, and the WO-MAN looketh upon the money and said, "SUCKER! Take this money and go buy me a pair of scissors, whereby I may clippeth upon this poodle and modify it to my own personal taste and secret moist innermost DESIRES." And the MAN, being the chump that he was, went out and bought her the poodle clipping shears and broughth 'em back to the WO-MAN and handeth the shears to the WO-MAN, whereupon she GRABBETH the poodle thusly . . . and with a DEFT, SWIFT, DENSE ECUMENICAL PATINA (Talk about it!) of STROKE (Talk about it!), she clippeth upon the poodle, near the FETLOCK, all across the THORAX, in the MEDULA, and . . . right near the cappuciano o'er here, and streamlined that sucker until it looked just like this, with little feet sticking out and a little ball on the end, making the dags very easy to remove, and she putteth the poodle in a quasi erotic sort of a position, near where she was sprawled out on the cave . . . stucketh her leggeths up unto the air, "Buf," like this, exposing to the poodle the central core of her desire, and looked deep into the poodle's eyes and said these piquant little words that we shall not soon forget:
"Dirty Love"
[backing vocals Tina Turner & The Ikettes]
Give me
Your dirty love
Like you might surrender
To some dragon in your dreams
Give me
Your dirty love
Like a pink donation
To the dragon in your dreams
I don't need your sweet devotion
An' I don't want your cheap emotion
Whip me up some dragon lotion
For your dirty love
Your dirty love
Give me
Your dirty love
Like some tacky little pamphlet
In your daddy's bottom drawer
Give me
Your dirty love
I don't believe you never seen
His book before
I don't need no consolation
I don't want your reservation
I only got one destination
An' that's your dirty love
Your dirty love
Give me
Your dirty love
Just like your mama
Make her fuzzy poodle do
(Oh, Frenchie . . . )
Give me
Your dirty love
The way your mama
Make that nasty poodle chew
I'll ignore your cheap aroma
And your little-bo-peep diploma
I'll just put you in a coma
With some dirty love
Some dirty love
That dirty love
That dirty love
THE POODLE BITES!
(Come on, Frenchie)
THE POODLE CHEWS IT!
(Snap it!)
THE POODLE BITES!
(Come on, Frenchie)
THE POODLE CHEWS IT!
(Snap it!)
THE POODLE BITES!
(Come on, Frenchie)
THE POODLE CHEWS IT!
(Snap it!)
THE POODLE BITES!
(Come on, Frenchie)
THE POODLE CHEWS IT!
(Not a speck of cereal!)
THE POODLE BITES!
(Come on, Frenchie)
THE POODLE CHEWS IT!
(Nothing but the best for my dog!)
THE POODLE BITES!
(Come on, Frenchie)
THE POODLE CHEWS IT!
(Come on!)
THE POODLE BITES!
(Come on, Frenchie)
THE POODLE CHEWS IT!
(Little paws sticking up!)
THE POODLE BITES!
(Little curly head!)
THE POODLE CHEWS IT!
(Little curly tail!)
"How Could I Be Such A Fool?"
When I won your love
I was very glad
Every happiness in the world
Belonged to me
Then our love was lost
And you went away
Now I shed my tears
In lonely misery
I know now that you never ever
Really loved me
It hurts me now to think you never ever
Really cared
I sit and ask myself a thousand times
To try and find
What really happened
To the love
That we shared
How could I be such a fool
How could I believe
All those lies you told me
How could I be taken in
By your sweet face
You spoiled our love
You ruined my life
I'm so tore down
I'm a terrible disgrace
But there will come a time
And you'll regret the way
You treated me
As if I was a fool
And didn't know
The many times you lied
About your love for me
Someone else is gonna know
That your love was just a show
How could I be such a fool
How could I believe
All those lies you told me
How could I be taken in
By your sweet face
You spoiled our love
You ruined my life
I'm so tore down
I'm a terrible disgrace
But there will come a time
And you'll regret the way
You treated me
As if I was a fool
And didn't know
The many times you lied
About your love for me
Someone else is gonna know
That your love was just a show
How could I be such a fool?
"I Ain't Got No Heart"
Ain't got no heart
I ain't got no heart to give away
I sit and laugh at fools in love
There ain't no such thing as love
No angels singing up above today
Girl I don't believe
Girl I don't believe in what you say
You say your heart is only mine
I say to you, you must be blind
What makes you think that you're so fine
That I would throw away
The groovy life 1 lead
'Cause baby, what you've got, yeah
It sure ain't what I need
Girl you'd better go
Girl you'd better go away
I think that life with you would1 be
Just not quite the thing for me
-Why hritsotau
"I'm Not Satisfied"
Yeah!
Got no place to go
(I'm tired of walking
Up and down the street all by myself)
No love left for me to give
(I tried and tried
But no one wants me the way I am)
Why should I pretend I like
To roam from door to door
Maybe I'll just kill myself
I just don't care no more
Because
I'm not satisfied
Everything I've tried
I don't like the way
Life has been abusing me
Yeah!
Yeah!
Who would care
If I was gone
(I never met no one
Who'd care if I was dead and gone)
Who needs me
To care for them
(Nobody needs me
Why should I just hang around?)
Why should I just sit and watch
While the others smile
I just wish that someone cared
If I was happy for a while
Because
I'm not satisfied
Everything I've tried
I don't like the way
Life has been abusing me
Yeah!
"Black Napkins"
Wee-ee-oooh
Wee-ee-oooh
Wee-ee-oooh
Wee-ee-oooh
Wee-ee-oooh
Wee-ee-oooh
Wee-ee-oooh
Wee-ee-oooh
Wee-ee-oooh
Wee-ee-oooh
Wee-ee-oooh
"Advance Romance"
No more credit
From the liquor store
Suit is all dirty, boy
Shoes is all wore
Tired and lonely, my
Heart is all sore
Advance romance
I can't stand it no more
Told me she loved me
I believed what she said
Took me for a sucker, boy
All corn-fed
Next thing I knew
She had a bolt on the door
Advance romance
I can't use it no more
She took George's watch
Like they always do
(It was a Timex, too!)
No more money, boy
I shoulda knew
The way she do me, boy
She might do you, too
Advance romance
People I am through!
Potato-head Bobby
was a friend of mine
Open three of his eyes
In the food stamp line
Open four of his eyes
In the food stamp line
Open five of his eyes
In the food stamp line
Open six of his yes
In the food stamp line
Said she might be a devil
But she sure was fine
Advance romance
He wanna try it one time
Later that night
He drop on by
Told her all he wanna do
Was step up and say "Hi"
Half an hour later
She had frenched his fry
Advance romance
Bobby, say good-bye
"The Illinois Enema Bandit"
The Illinois Enema Bandit
I heard he's on the loose
I heard he's on the loose
Lord, the pitiful screams
Of all them college-educated women . . .
Boy, he'd just be tyin' 'em up
(They'd be all bound down!)
Just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla
The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice
He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla
The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice
[repeat]
The Illinois Enema Bandit ! heard it on the news !
I heard it on the news
Bloomington Illinois ... he has caused some alarm
Just sneakin' around there
From farm to farm
Got a rubberized bag
And a hose on his arm
Lookin' for some rustic co-ed rump
That he just might wanna pump
[repeat]
The Illinois Enema Bandit
Some day he'll have to pay
Some day he'll have to pay
The police will say, "You're under arrest!"
And the judge would have him for a special guest
The D.A. will order a secret test
And stuff his pudgy little thumbs in the side of his vest
Then they'll put out a call for the jury folks
And the judge would say, "No poo-poo jokesl"
Then they'll drag in the bandit for all to see,
Saying "Don't nobody have no sympathy . . .
HOT SOAPY WATER in the FIRST DEGREE!"
And the Bandit might say, "Why is everbody always pickin' on me?"
WELL DID YOU CAUSE THIS MISERY?
WELL DID YOU CAUSE THIS MISERY?
WELL DID YOU CAUSE THIS MISERY?
One girl shout: "Let the Bandit be!"
BANDIT ARE YOU GUILTY?
TELL ME, WHAT'S YOUR PLEA?
Another girl shout; "Let fhe friend go free!"
ARE YOU GUILTY?
BANDIT, DID YOU DO THESE DEEDS?
"he Bandit say, "It must be just what they all needs . . "
[etc. repeat]
"Wind Up Workin' In A Gas Station"
This here song might offend you some
If it does, it's because you're dumb
That's the way it is where I come from
If you've been there too, let me see your thumb
Let me see your thumb
(Ah, let me see your thumb)
Let me see your thumb
(Ah, let me see your thumb)
Let me see your thumb
(Ah, let me see your thumb)
Let me see your thumb
(Ah, let me see your thumb)
Let me see your thumb
(Ah, let me see your thumb)
Let me see your thumb
(Ah, let me see your thumb)
Let me see your thumb
(Ah, let me see your thumb)
Let me see your thumb
(Ah, let me see your thumb)
Show me your thumb if you're really dumb
Show me your thumb if you're really dumb
Show me your thumb if you're really dumb
Show me your thumb if you're dumb
Hey now, better make a decision
Be a moron and keep your position
You oughta know now all your education
Won't help you no-how, you're gonna . . .
Wind up workin' in a gas station
Wind up workin' in a gas station
Wind up workin' in a gas station
Wind up workin' in a gas station
Pumpin' the gas every night
Pumpin' the gas every night
Wind up workin' in a gas station
Wind up workin' in a gas station
Pumpin' the gas every night
Pumpin' the gas every night
Wind up workin' in a gas station
Wind up workin' in a gas station
Manny de Camper vants to buy some vite
(Wind up workin' in a gas station
Wind up workin' in a gas station)
(Fish!)
Manny de Camper vants to buy some vite
(Wind up workin' in a gas station
Wind up workin' in a gas station)
(Fish!)
Manny de Camper vants to buy some vite
(Wind up workin' in a gas station
Wind up workin' in a gas station)
(Fish!)
Manny de Camper vants to buy some vite
(Wind up workin' in a gas station
Wind up workin' in a gas station)
(Fish!)
Wind up workin' in a gas station
Wind up workin' in a gas station
Wind up workin' in a gas station
Wind up workin' in a gas station
"The Torture Never Stops"
Flies all green 'n buzzin' in his dungeon of despair
Prisoners grumble and piss their clothes and scratch their matted hair
A tiny light from a window hole a hundred yards away
Is all they ever get to know about the regular life in the day;
An' it stinks so bad the stones been chokin'
'N weepin' greenish drops
In the room where the giant fire puffer works
'N the torture never stops
The torture never stops
Slime 'n rot, rats 'n snot 'n vomit on the floor
Fifty ugly soldiers, man, holdin' spears by the iron door
Knives 'n spikes 'n guns 'n the likes of every tool of pain
An' a sinister midget with a bucket an' a mop where the blood goes down the drain;
An' it stinks so bad the stones been chokin'
'N weepin' greenish drops
In the room where the giant fire puffer works
'N the torture never stops
The torture never stops
The torture
The torture
The torture never stops.
Flies all green 'n buzzin' in his dungeon of despair
An evil prince eats a steamin' pig in a chamber right near there
He eats the snouts 'n the trotters first
The loin's 'n the groin's is soon dispersed
His carvin' style is well rehearsed
He stands and shouts
All men be cursed
All men be cursed
All men be cursed
All men be cursed
And disagree, well no-one durst
He's the best of course of all the worst
Some wrong been done, he done it first
(Well, well) An' he stinks so bad, his bones been chokin'
(Yeah) 'N weepin' greenish drops,
(Well) In the night of the iron sausage,
(Well) Where the torture never stops
The torture never stops
The torture
The torture
The torture never stops.
Flies all green 'n buzzin' in his dungeon of despair
Who are all those people that he's locked away up there
Are they crazy?,
Are they sainted?
Are they zeros someone painted?,
It has never been explained since at first it was created
But a dungeon like a sin
Requires naught but lockin' in
Of everything that's ever been
Look at hers
Look at him
That's what's the deal we're dealing in
That's what's the deal we're dealing in
That's what's the deal we're dealing in
That's what's the deal we're dealing in
"Kaiser Rolls"
This is a story, tell it quick as I can
A week ago, I met a stumbler man
He stumbled up, he said, "All I wanna know,
How far the hratche-plche Kaiser Rolls"
I begged his pardon, should have turned and ran,
So hard talking to a stumbler man
He stumbled over, and over again
"The Kaiser hratche Rolls since time began"
I raised my finger from the center of my hand,
Tried to wave farewell to the stumbler man
He slobbered 'n puked (PUGH!) in a garbage can
"The Kaiser hratche Rollin' might raise some sand"
Pushed him aside as he was slowin' my plan
So hard to understand a real stumbler man
Some stuff from his nose, crawled over his clothes, he said,
"Nobody ever tells me which way he goes"
Kaiser rolls 'n rolls 'n rolls
Kaiser rolls, and Kaiser rolls
Surprise to me they ain't catched him yet,
HOW'S ABOUT A DOLLAR FOR SOME CIGARETTE?
"Find Her Finer"
Find her finer, sneak up behind her
Wrapped like a mummy till you finally unwind her
Find her blinder, see who designed her
Act like a dummy till you finally grind her
If you should see a girl on the street
Now maybe you might think she is sweet
But if you wanna tickle her treat
Now really, what should you do?
(Rat-tat-tat-tat ta-da!)
Don't never let her know you are smart
The universe is no place to start
You gotta play it straight from the heart
She gwine renunciate you
(That's why you gotta . . . )
Find her finer, sneak up behind her
Wrapped like a mummy till you finally unwind her
Find her blinder, see who designed her
Act like a dummy till you finally grind her
Now maybe you might think this is crude
And maybe you might think I am rude
And maybe this approach I have spewed
Is not the one for you
(Rat-tat-tat-tat ta-da!)
But believe me later on you'll find
As you impress her with your mind
That you would just be left behind
For a wiser fool
(So you might as well)
Find her finer, sneak up behind her
Wrapped like a mummy till you finally unwind her
Find her blinder, see who designed her
Act like a dummy till you finally grind her
Find her finer, sneak up behind her
Wrapped like a mummy till you finally unwind her
Find her blinder, see who designed her
Act like a dummy till you finally grind her
Find her finer, sneak up behind her
Wrapped like a mummy till you finally unwind her
Find her blinder, see who designed her
Act like a dummy till you finally grind her
Find her finer, sneak up behind her
Wrapped like a mummy till you finally unwind her
Find her blinder, see who designed her
Act like a dummy till you finally grind her
Find her finer, sneak up behind her
Wrapped like a mummy till you finally unwind her
Find her blinder, see who designed her
Act like a dummy till you finally grind her
"Carolina Hard-Core Ecstasy"
I coulda swore her hair was made of rayon
She wore a Milton Bradley Crayon
But she was something I could lay on
Can't remember what became of me . . .
Carolina Hardcore Ecstasy
She put a Doobie Brothers tape on
I had a Roger Daitrey cape on
There was a bed I dumped her shape on
Can't remember what became of me . . .
Carolina Hardcore Ecstasy
Somewhat later on
I woke up and she was gone
There was dew out on the lawn
In the sunrise
Later she came back
With a rumpled paper sack
Which she told me would contain
A surprise
She stuck her hand right in it to the bottom
Said she knew I'd be surprised she got'em
Take a Charleston pimp to spot 'em
Then she gave a pair of shoes to me ...
Plastic leather, 14 Triple D
I said: I wonder what's the shoes for
She told me: Don't you worry no more
And got right down there on the tile floor:
Now Darling STOMP ALL OVER ME! ...
Carolina Hardcore Ecstasy
Is this something new
Having people stomp on you?
Is it what I need to do
For your pleasure?
What is this, a quiz?
Don't you worry what it is
It is merely just a moment
I can treasure
By ten o'clock her arms and legs were rendered
She couldn't talk 'cause her mouth had been extendered
Looked to me as though she had been blendered
But was this abject misery?
No! No!
Carolina Hardcore Ecstasy!
It might seem strange to Herb and Dee -
Carolina Hardcore Ecstasy!
"Lonely Little Girl"
[includes second part of What's The Ugliest Part Of Your Body?]
You're a lonely little girl
But your Mommy & your Daddy don't care
You're a lonely little girl
The things they say
Just hurt your heart
It's too late now
For them to start
To understand
The way you feel
The world for them
Is too unreal
So you're lonely, lonely, lonely,
Lonely little girl
You're lonely . . .
ALL YOUR CHILDREN ARE POOR
UNFORTUNATE VICTIMS OF
SYSTEMS BEYOND THEIR CONTROL
Where did Annie go
When she went to town?
Who are all those creeps
That she brings around?
A PLAGUE UPON YOUR IGNORANCE & THE GRAY
DESPAIR OF YOUR UGLY LIFE
ALL YOUR CHILDREN ARE POOR
UNFORTUNATE VICTIMS OF LIES . . .
Where did Annie go
When she went . . .
"Take Your Clothes Off When You Dance"
There will come a time when everybody
Who is lonely will be free . . .
TO SING & DANCE & LOVE
There will come a time when every evil
That we know will be an evil . . .
THAT WE CAN RISE ABOVE
Who cares if hair is long or short
Or sprayed or partly grayed . . .
WE KNOW THAT HAIR AIN'T WHERE IT'S AT
(there will come a time when you won't even be ashamed if you are fat!)
WAH WAH-WAH WAH
La la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la (a-a-ah!)
La la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la (oo-wee-ooh!)
Diddle-diddle-dee
(Diddle-diddle-dee)
Diddle-diddle-dee
(Diddle-diddle-dee)
Diddle-diddle-dee
(Diddle-diddle-dee)
Diddle-diddle-dee
(Diddle-diddle-dee)
La la la la la la la la la la la la
La la la la la
WAH WAH-WAH WAH
There will come a time when everybody
Who is lonely will be free . . .
TO SING & DANCE & LOVE (dance and love)
There will come a time when every evil
That we know will be an evil . . .
THAT WE CAN RISE ABOVE (rise above)
Who cares if you're so poor you can't afford
To buy a pair of Mod A Go-Go stretch-elastic pants . . .
THERE WILL COME A TIME WHEN YOU CAN EVEN
TAKE YOUR CLOTHES OFF WHEN YOU DANCE
"What's The Ugliest Part Of Your Body?"
What's the ugliest
Part of your body?
What's the ugliest
Part of your body?
Some say your nose
Some say your toes
(I think it's your mind)
But I think it's YOUR MIND
(Your mind)
I think it's your mind, woo woo
ALL YOUR CHILDREN ARE POOR
UNFORTUNATE VICTIMS OF
SYSTEMS BEYOND THEIR CONTROL
A PLAGUE UPON YOUR IGNORANCE & THE GRAY
DESPAIR OF YOUR UGLY LIFE
Where did Annie go
When she went to town?
Who are all those creeps
That she brings around?
ALL YOUR CHILDREN ARE POOR
UNFORTUNATE VICTIMS OF LIES YOU BELIEVE
A PLAGUE UPON YOUR IGNORANCE THAT KEEPS
THE YOUNG FROM THE TRUTH THEY DESERVE . . .
"Keep It Greasy"
[includes Incan Art Vamp]
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Roll it over 'n grease it down
I'll drive you through the heart of town
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Roll it over 'n grease it down
I'll drive you through the heart of town
Good women, they sure has it tough
Good men, well there just ain't enough
Good girls are lookin' all the time
Good men is something that they can't find
If they find one miraculously
They try to be lovin' as they can be
'Cause if they find one and let him go
Chances are they might not never find no mo'
So they keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Roll it over 'n grease it down
I'll drive you through the heart of town
Grease it down
Grease it down
(Gimme some grease!)
Grease it down
(Please!)
Grease it down
Grease it down
(I want some grease, baby)
Grease it down
Grease it down
Grease it . . .
A good lovin' man is hardest to find
A good woman needs to ease her mind
I know a few that need to ease it behind
All y'gotta do is grease it down
'N everything is fine
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Roll it over 'n grease it down
I'll drive you through the heart of town
A girl don't need
No fancy grease
To get herself
Some rump release
Any kind
Of lube'll do
Maybe from another
Part of you
Lube from the North
Lube from the South
Take a little slobber
(Take a little slobber!)
From the side of your mouth
Roll it over
Grease it down
Here come that crazy
Screamin' sound . . .
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Roll it over 'n grease it down
I'll drive you
I said I would drive you
I said I was gonna drive you
All the way how-hown
[FZ:] Napoleon Murphy Brock on tenor sax and lead vocals, Andre Lewis on keyboards, Terry Bozzio on drums, Roy Estrada on bass, thanks for coming to the concert, good night!
"Dinah-Moe Humm"
[backing vocals Tina Turner & The Ikettes]
I couldn't say where she's coming' from,
But I just met a lady named Dinah-Moe Humm
She stroll on over, say look here, bum,
I got a forty dollar bill say you can't make me cum
(Y'jes can't do it)
She made a bet with her sister who's a little bit dumb
She could prove it any time all men was scum
I don't mind that she called me a bum,
But I knew right away she was really gonna cum
(So I got down to it)
I whipped off her bloomers 'n stiffened my thumb
An' applied rotation on her sugar plum
I poked 'n stroked till my wrist got numb
But I still didn't hear no Dinah-Moe Humm,
Dinah-Moe Humm
Dinah-Moe Humm
Dinah-Moe Humm
Where's this Dinah-Moe
Comin' from
I done spent three hours
An' I ain't got a crumb
From the Dinah-Moe, Dinah-Moe, Dinah-Moe
From the Dinah-Moe Humm
Got a spot that gets me hot, ow!
An' you ain't been to it
(No no no no!)
Got a spot that gets me hot, ow!
An' you ain't been to it
(No no no!)
Got a spot that gets me hot
But you ain't been to it
(No no no no no!)
Got a spot that gets me hot
But you ain't been to it
'Cause I can't get into it
Unless I get out of it
An' I gotta get out of it
Before I get into it
'Cause I never get into it
Unless I get out of it
An' I gotta be out of it
To get myself into it
(She looked over at me with a glazed eye
And some bovine perspiration on her upper lip area
And she said . . . )
Just get me wasted
An' you're half-way there
'Cause if my mind's tore up,
Then my body don't care
I rubbed my chinny-chin-chin
An' said my-my-my
What sort of thing
Might this lady get high upon?
I checked out her sister
Who was holdin' the bet
An' wondered what kind of trip
The young lady was on
The forty dollar bill didn't matter no more
When her sister got nekkid an' laid on the floor
She said Dinah-Moe might win the bet
But she could use a little [?] if I wasn't done yet
I told her . . .
Just because the sun
Want a place in the sky
No reason to assume
I wouldn't give her a try
So I pulled on her hair
Got her legs in the air
An' asked if she had any cooties on there
(Whaddya mean cooties! No cooties on me!)
She was buns-up kneelin'
BUNS UP!
I was wheelin' an dealin'
WHEELIN' AN' DEALIN' AN' OOOOH!
She surrender to the feelin'
SHE SWEETLY SURRENDERED
An' she started in to squealin'
Dinah-Moe watched from the edge of the bed
With her lips just a-twitchin' an' her face gone red
Some drool rollin' down
From the edge of her chin
While she spied the condition
Her sister was in
She quivered 'n quaked
An' clutched at herself
While her sister made a joke
About her mental health
'Till Dinah-Moe finally
Did give in
But I told her
All she really needed
Was some discipline . . .
Kiss my aura . . . Dora . . .
M-M-M . . . it's real angora
Would y'all like some more-a?
Right here on the flora?
An' how 'bout you, Fauna?
Y'wanna?
MMM . . . sound like you're chokin' on somethin'
Did you say you want some more?
Well, here's some more . . .
(Oh, baby . . . )
Oh, sure . . . look,
D'you think I could interest you
In a pair of zircon-encrusted tweezers?
MMM . . . tweezers!
Wait a minute, lemme sterilize 'em . . .
Gimme your lighter . . .
I couldn't say where she's coming' from
But I just met a lady named Dinah-Moe Humm
She stroll on over, say look here, bum,
I got a forty dollar bill say you can't make me cum
(Y'jes can't do it)
I whipped off her bloomers 'n stiffened my thumb
An' applied rotation on her sugar plum
I poked 'n stroked till my wrist got numb
An' you know I heard some Dinah-Moe Humm
Some Dinah-Moe Humm
Dinah-Moe Humm
Dinah-Moe Humm
Dinah-Moe
Dinah-Moe
Some Dinah-Moe
An' a little Dinah-Moe
An' some Dinah-Moe
An' some Dinah-Moe
An' some Dinah-Moe
An' a little Dinah-Moe
An' some Dinah-Moe
An' some Dinah-Moe
An' some Dinah-Moe
An' a Dinah-Moe again
An' Dinah-Moe
An' Dora too, lil' Dinah 'n Dora
An' Dinah-Moe
Kiss my aura, Dinah
"Camarillo Brillo"
She had that
Camarillo brillo
Flamin' out along her head,
I mean her Mendocino bean-o
By where some bugs had made it red
She ruled the Toads of the Short Forest
And every newt in Idaho
And every cricket who had chorused
By the bush in Buffalo
She said she was
A Magic Mama
And she could throw a mean Tarot
And carried on without a comma
That she was someone I should know
She had a snake for a pet
And an amulet
And she was breeding a dwarf
But she wasn't done yet
She had gray-green skin
A doll with a pin
I told her she was awright
But I couldn't come in
(I couldn't come in right then . . . )
And so she wandered
Through the door-way
Just like a shadow from the tomb
She said her stereo was four-way
An' I'd just love it in her room
Well, I was born
To have adventure
So I just followed up the steps
Right past her fuming incense stencher
To where she hung her castanets
She stripped away
Her rancid poncho
An' laid out naked by the door
We did it till we were un-concho
An' it was useless any more
She had a snake for a pet
And an amulet
And she was breeding a dwarf
But she wasn't done yet
She had gray-green skin
A doll with a pin
I told her she was awright
But I couldn't come in
(actually, I was very busy then)
And so she wandered
Through the door-way
Just like a shadow from the tomb
She said her stereo was four-way
An' I'd just love it in her room
Well, I was born
To have adventure
So I just followed up the steps
Right past her fuming incense stencher
To where she hung her castanets
She said she was
A Magic Mama
And she could throw a mean Tarot
And carried on without a comma
That she was someone I should know
(Is that a real poncho . . . I mean
Is that a Mexican poncho or is that a Sears poncho?
Hmmm . . . no foolin' . . . )
"Muffin Man"
The Muffin Man is seated at the table
In the laboratory of the Utility Muffin
Research Kitchen . . .
Reaching for an oversized chrome spoon
He gathers an intimate quantity of dried muffin remnants
And brushing his scapular aside
Proceeds to dump these inside of his shirt. . .
He turns to us and speaks:
"Some people like cupcakes better. I for one
Care less for them!"
Arrogantly twisting the sterile canvas snoot
of a fully charged icing anointment utensil
He pools forth a quarter-ounce green rosette (oh ah yuk yuk.
let's try that again . . .!)
He pools forth a quarter-ounce green rosette
Near the summit of a dense but radiant muffin
of his own design.
Later he says: "Some people . . . some people like cupcakes exclusively,
While I myself say there is naughl nor ought there be
Nothing so exalted on the faceof God's grey earth
As that prince of foods . . . The Muffin!"
Girl you thoughl he was a man
Bul he was a muffin
He hung around lill you found
That he didn't know nuthin'
Girl you thought he was a man
But he only was a-puffin'
No cries is heard in the night
As a result of him stuffin'
"Kaiser Rolls (Du Jour)"
[January 6, 1976
Rehearsal]
This is a story, tell it quick as I can
A week ago, I met a stumbler man
He stumbled up, he said, "All I wanna know,
How far the hratche-plche Kaiser Rolls"
I begged his pardon, should have turned and ran,
So hard talking to a stumbler man
He stumbled over, and over again
"The Kaiser hratche Rolls since time began"
Raised my finger from the center of my hand,
Tried to wave farewell to the stumbler man
He slobbered 'n puked in a garbage can
"The Kaiser hratche Rollin' might raise some sand"
Pushed him aside as he was slowin' my plan
So hard to understand a real stumbler man
Some stuff from his nose, crawled over his clothes, he said,
"Nobody ever tells me which way he goes"
Kaiser rolls 'n rolls 'n rolls
Kaiser rolls, and Kaiser rolls
Surprise to me they ain't catched him yet,
HOW'S ABOUT A DOLLAR FOR SOME CIGARETTE?